Need To Get Back

Writing has always been therapeutic for me.  As I assume it is for most people that blog.

When I started this version of my blog, I was not yet 40.  I intended on writing about dating, sports, reality TV and whatever else seemed to pop into my head.  It mostly centered around dating.  The losers I was talking to from the internet.  The wide world web of dickheads.  The liars, the losers, the freaks.  The really hot ones that would never be interested in a girl like me.

Shortly after turning 40, I met E.  I wrote a lot about him and the journey to us becoming a couple.  But since we’ve become “we”, I haven’t written much.  For a few different reasons.

The first reason is that when things are good, what am I going to say?  “Things are good.  E made me dinner last night.  Then we watched Survivor and went to bed”.  That’s not exciting.  That isn’t worth writing about.

The second reason is that when things are not so good, I’m worried that he will someday track this blog down and read it.  I don’t need that kind of shit.  Like a mother or brother reading your diary.  Who needs it?

I also have nothing interesting to say about sports.  Kings still suck.  LeBron and Curry were in the finals, AGAIN this year.  The Braves aren’t that good.  The Raiders are moving to Vegas.

Ooooohhhh, exciting writing Andi.  Bring on the followers and new comments.

“yes, the Kings are still bad and always will be”

“Go LeBron”

“Go Steph”

So here is my dilemma and I am sincerely looking for feedback.

Do I come on here when needed and vent about things that aren’t perfect in my world? Do I talk about how LaVar Ball is going to ruin his son’s career, before it even gets started?  Do I let myself vent (outloud) about the disaster that is Corinne and DeMario on Paradise?

I miss writing.  I miss the interaction.  I miss getting this shit off my chest, so I don’t take it home and eat an entire pint of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream.

Maturity

The level of maturity at my current company, since I gave my notice, is unbelievable.

The CEO made me cry.   The CFO asked me how the job market was.  The two HR ladies haven’t spoken one word to me.  The receptionist, who thinks she owns the place, won’t even look my direction.

I guess the good news is that at least I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I am making the right decision.

GROW THE FUCK UP.

Sometimes, It Just Doesn’t Fit

I worked in the same industry, with the same people, doing the same job, for 12 years. The company was sold, over and over, but the job and the people didn’t change.

I loved that job.  Even with the acquisitions, the lay-offs due to company relocation and the several different supervisors I had over the years, I loved it.

I was good at my job.

Really good at it.

On July 29, 2016, I was laid off.  They company was shutting down and moving operations back to the East coast.  We were all laid off.  We were all angry.  We were all scared.

I started my new job on August 8, 2016.

It was not the job of my dreams, even when I interviewed, but I was scared. Unemployment would not be enough to live on.  They offered me the job and I started it. It was a paycheck.  Plain and simple.

I have been here 10 months now.  I can remember how it felt on my first day here, going home and crying, because I knew it wasn’t right.  This company and this job was not for me.

Since I started here, 10 months ago, we have laid off about half the staff.  There have been 8-10 people that have given notice and moved on.  I have never been at a company that had turnover, like this company does.  Firing, laying off, quitting.  It is a rotating door of employees.

Now, in the defense of this company, this may be the norm.  The industry I was in before was so small, that people didn’t leave.  They had special skill sets that caused them to be valuable.  There was little to no turnover.

At this job, I am bored about 90% of the time.  I spend a lot of time re-writing processes, fixing part number descriptions and browsing for interesting stories online.  Thank you to all of you who write blogs, so I have something to do everyday!

In March, they hired a new CFO.  He is my direct supervisor.  I have never worked for someone that I felt so disconnected from.  He has spent no time learning what I do, sitting with me or showing any interest in the supply chain aspect of this company.  He called me negative, to my face, after I showed concern after the latest lay off.

Yesterday, it finally happened.

I finally got the call, I’ve so desperately been waiting on.

I was offered a job, doing what I love, for a stable company with very low turnover.

I’m so happy.  SO FUCKING HAPPY.

Peace out, current job!  This girl is moving on!